My wardrobe is unbelievably messy because theres so much stuff I have to fit in it, because my room is small compared to all the other rooms. I really liked that you had some really awesome words in your writing that really hooked me in and made it more intresting to keep on reading along. My rooms walls are two different colours. Probably you will see my bed first it's right under my window right in the center in my room. Now, were talking about the place of work starting to feel like youre home because youre there so much. I also have my Xbox which is of the things I play when Im not doing anything. I slowly put my hand on the door handle and opened it, the sun instantly warmed me up, the colours stood out, the bed looked very cosy and the wall decoration looked very creative and bright. The colouring is a dark grey frame with translucent drawers. My wardrobe layout has all my shoes which i only have two pairs, hanging up are all my nice clothes. But at one point you said in your accessories paragraph "But they aren't dirty they are actually quite clean all thanks to my dog." They dont like the feeling every day of having to entertain themselves at home! They will use and expand upon it again and again within creative writing and narrative writing topics, and there are so many ways to get those creative juices flowing. It gives a very accurate picture of Sophie's room. One time I bounced a ping pong ball over my bed and landed then bounced off the floor and landed in the cup it was insane. Good description of your bedroom (mess and all). Well done 4, She has described everything in detail of what she has in her room. That is exactly what it looks like. This is to say that one person (your mother, father, wife, husband) is the person who makes you feel most comfortable and relaxed. You've likely heard many primary metaphors throughout the course of your life and studies. My bedroom is in the middle of two other bedrooms. All of this talking about my room reminded me of something, I need to clean it or Ill get banned from the Xbox. Maybe next time try to write more in some paragraphs, and tell us about more things. All over the wall on one side are posters of things I like such as rugby posters and some flags. The cast on The bedroom is a place of solitude, a place to just relax, I spend most of my time either sleeping or reading and the rest of the time is for cleaning, it's not the fanciest but it's mine. Muesli bar wrappers, food wrappers and clothes tags are a common item found on my floor. At the end of the bed lies a fluffy pink mat that is placed directly in front of my built in wardrobe, where other pieces of clothing go. Except for the Furniture paragraph. The spelling and Grammar was good and no spelling mistakes but you could use some more descriptive words. My curtains are also blue. there was only just a few full stops being misplaced but overall it was really great. I also have a desk and chair next to my big window. This is a good peace of writing. My bedroom is Santa's workshop during December. Again, were applying the feelings of being at home (relaxation and comfort) to some other situation and achieving this by making a comparative metaphor. You have got great vocabulary. You can see my chook shed and the house paddock with a woolshed at the back of it. 036-536 88 75. The temperature of the room is balanced. Well done though :-). I also love my reading area and the way that my half of the of my bedroom gets most of the sun. Four dark grey walls. My bedroom is a medium size which I think fits everything in nicely. Other than using my bedroom for sleeping I use it for quiet time, keeping up with what's on social media and sometimes doing my homework. I also have two Japanese swords in my room and one of them are a full size katana and makes my room feel like i'm safe if anyone tries to break in. like how you have used brackets. Both beds are king single, with 3-4 pillows and very comfy sheets. It is sunny and bright, and shows off my disposition. Brooke, I like the way you used your vocabulary skills. The carpet packs a warm feel to the room as it completes it and gives it a nice finish. I like my bedroom just the way it is. There's pictures everywhere, bright jewelry, and so many perfumes on my duchess. We're i can't use it when i'm in my bed! I made my bedroom the way I wanted it and set it up the way I liked it. Overall I think my room is an amazing space and deserves a lot more love and cleaning to keep it in peak condition. Your writing is very descriptive. The final part of the room is the space, the space of the room is kinda small which is a good thing because that mean that I can do cool ping pong trick shots. There are many spaces of my room everything from cloths on the draws and my bed in the corner. the spelling was great and I really enjoyed reading the of writing you worked on. I wonder what you would change about it if you had the chance too? You could imagine if you lived in a house with a lot of children that you might feel like you were in a playground at times. All my shiny medals from past sporting events and competitions hang next to my wardrobe. The blankets on my bed are very colourful there is a bright red, white and grey striped blanket, a soft pink one and a plain white one. When you walk into my room you can tell it is mine because my name is on my wardrobe door and my room is the only room in the house that has a blue wall. Maybe next time don't use 'my' too much. If you listen closely you can hear the constant purring of my kitten who is almost always a curled up fluff ball on my bed, you can also hear the random gurgling of the radiator and maybe the odd dragging of the paws on my midget staffy snuffling about for food. I have a cupboard kind of in the shape of some steps so that I can get up to my tall bed, I'm replacing this storage unit for some climbing holds. I walked through the door and stood still just looking into my bedroom. But most of the time, me and Sam are in different moods. They are also a good way to annoy everyone in the house and wake them up when I want to. In your writing I have noticed that you need to improve the proper use of functuation. Next time your could probably add some more descriptive words, not saying that there was not any but just add some more in like more bigger descriptive words. Very well written i liked the word choices and how you alborated on it, there was nothing that I could find that needed work i would give you a 4+, Very good way of describing room. There are green curtains in my room that catch your eyes. 3rd paragraph "one of them are a full size katana" should be As you enter my bedroom the first thing you see is the large divider that sits in the middle of my room separating my sister and I. It fits my school clothes, jerseys and other stuff. Near where this wall joins the feature wall there is another painting. As you take a small tentative step through my bedroom door, the first thing you shall see is my old, wooden, glory box, that looks as though it has seen many times, both good and bad. Firstly, the furniture. You really made me think of what your room would've looked like with your little brothers toy box and with the bog window and the red wall. On the other side of my bed, sits the divider that holds all of my well-loved books and DVDs. Now lets talk about the mess. I have a black carpet with a white lines diagonally going through it. I thought you could have added more adjectives to describe the objects you talked about (such as the Lego and drums) but I loved how you used words such as wade instead of walk, avalanche instead of fall and navigate instead of look/travel. You also need to double check that your sentences making sense. This situation becomes extra annoying in the afternoon, where the sun is falling down to the horizon, which makes is way too bright when Im sitting at my desk and doing homework. 5, Can you use tactical language only to describe your bed. I am happy that Thomas likes his room, airy and small and keeps it tidy. I like the way you described it and detailed all of your ideas in paragraphs. Sometimes the temperature goes up and sometimes goes right down. Antenna Tv Buffalo, your writing was very descriptive but maybe some more advanced vocabulary needed. It is filled with different kinds of art, photos and bedding. You could have added some more descriptive words in there. Teatukuras bedroom Here, theyre using comparison (that a vault is hard to get into, just like the home), but instead of saying like a vault, theyre saying is a vault, for literary effect. If were in a restless, jumpy and excited mood, then we may as well have OCD, because everything will be perfect. The jewelry box once belonged my wonderful Mother. make sure it's extra creamy!!! My bedroom All Rights Reserved. The only messy things in my room is my carpet. cock is life. My room is the best room in my house I think this because of the warmth and the softness in it, (mostly my bed) I would like to give you a tour about my queen size bed. Feed-forward - You didn't put as much detail as you should've and there was a few spelling mistakes, you need to put a bit more detail and go over it to make sure you haven't got any spelling mistakes. I look up at the ceiling and see a spider in the corner. Also my room is full of stuff to have fun with but my favorite thing to do is make cool trickshot area so I can record them and post them on to my YouTube channel. Don't even get me started on my desk it's hardly a desk anymore it's just for storage.anything my mum tells me to pick up off the floor I most of the time just chuck it to the top of my desk or in the three sequenced in size draws that I can no longer hardly open because there full of unneeded nonsense already. The layout and space in my room is the most important thing in my room to me. A metaphor for a bedroom could be, " His bedroom is like a sauna since the air conditioner broke." On the door it has my name (Will) and other things I made in hard materials. The layout of the room has a facing direction pointing at the north east with side on single beds one near the huge closets and one across near the sliding windows for the sun to enter. As an Amazon Associate I Earn from Qualifying Purchases. My bedroom is down the hallway on the right next to the big purple bathroom. My layout, it isn't the most complex layout but if you say it 5 times it's definitely complex. Often, home is the place where we feel safest. I think its very organised also it makes it feel spacious. From my green reading lamp to my dart board, my patterned roman blinds and funky hooks on the wall. 4+, Oh my goodness Jake! Good job! 6. as noisy as the market. I like how big my room is because its a good size for me to just lay on the ground and play on my devices or read. Its nice to get up to something like that. My bedframe is made out of a dark wood and is the size of a king single. They are stacked up quite messily. When did organ music become associated with baseball? There isn't really a theme to it. My walls are plain white and the carpet is a nice, soft contrasting dark colour. Personally . next time leave out the details about the dust! My bed is in the corner of my room and is out of the way so you don't have to walk around it. I stroll into my room and the bright colours instantly pop out. Cris Borgnine Wikipedia, Sometimes a little bit of exaggeration creates the best metaphors. I have many wall decorations in my room ranging from many colours such as black, red, white, green, blue, pink and yellow. It holds over 40 books as well as countless keepsakes, wires and old toys. So my cabinet in the corner it's a old wooden cabinet which just holds all my clothes. colossal objects shoot up overshadowing the carpet, which is the forest floor; allowing a hazy light to hit the rugged ground. You may find me laying there reading a book in the natural light coming through my window, which is my main source of light. Save my name, email, and website in this browser for the next time I comment. The darker colors in my room are mainly my wardrobe doors and my duvet, my duvet is black, grey and a dark orange. I suck creamy cock. Solfeggio 852 Hz, I agree with the carpet needing vacuumed, I've been telling you for weeks too. In my room I have a book on my beside table that I am reading and I have books in my wardrobe that I have already read or need to be read. He is a untidy Australian Barraband and he is loud with a weird sense of humor some how. A medium size room down the end of a long hallway. Megan your vocab was very good with describing things. JESS'S BEDROOM DESCRIPTION Great writing Shadyn really liked it, I still ant that ps4 of yours though! My bed is nearly always made. Awards are the next important thing that has to be hung up to admire the things I have done. I also enjoy the way that my room is positioned and how it looks (when it's tidy). You spelt it as color (the American way). Some of the punctuation was a little muddled some of the I's were not where they needed to be and in between the full stops and the next sentence there were no spaces. Yes it definately is the best bedroom in the house and yes we are all jealous!!!! Love Mum x. DOOGIES BEDROOM I like how you have used lots of descriptive words. I also have a variety of colourful possessions around the room. I dont ever think of changing my carpet but if I was then I would just throw heaps of pillows down onto my floor, that would be very comfy. the shape of her room. However, if you cautiously open the drawer, it looks as if a bomb has exploded inside. Did you use a dictionary?If not Excellent spelling. My half of the bedroom is on the east side of the house, meaning that Im directly in front of one of our three gardens. Your paragraphs could of been a bit bigger, I like your ideas and you described it really wall. There is clothes such as shirts and shorts mixed in with stuffed toys and shoes. I like spending time in my room, because I like having my own space and its a good place to be by myself. Firstly Pokemon, I absolutely love Pokemon I have four plushies, dont judge me all right. There is also a big built in wardrobe which has heaps of space in it ( where I chuck all my stuff in). Penultimate par5agraph the full stop at the end goes inside of the brackets. Even though my room hasnt got much in it, my room is the tidiest bedroom there. The lampshade sits on my bedside table along side my phone, phone charger, a clock, a cold water bottle and random pieces of paper. So in conclusion my bedroom is the best in the house because it soft, layout just for me the colors just right and last of all it's the only place in the whole house where I can get some alone time and not be nagged! my clothes. It is a square shape and it is warm. I am lucky as the sunlight peeks over the fence and smothers my walls with a bright, warm glow. It's a great description but like Alex said, you could give it more ideas and elaborate more on the topic to make it a better description. Inside that drawer is where I hold more of my goods and books. It is a stationary calamity! I have been in your room but I think you have to clean your room before a gest gets there a ha ha 4. This is where I do my homework. I give a 4. You have described your room well and I can paint a picture. You can see the green and purple lettuce growing in the sauna like glass house and the drenched clothes hanging on the washing line. In general, one might get the idea that metaphors are preferred to describe a bad user experience rather than a good one. My room could be a bit neater though! But all of this is because the entire house is new, in fact it's not even finished!, although with all these bonuses I don't go into my bedroom that often. But all of this mess isn't caused by me its made by my annoying, loud and messy sister (Well that's what I like to think) Overall I love my room. Every room has accessories, even if it isnt a bedroom. The door is white with a mirror on it. I love my room and everyone loves their room but me living in newly renovated garage is great but has some downsides to it. It has creamy vanilla wallpaper with 2 rose red chandeliers that hang of the corners of my room. You could visualize your whole room.The furniture paragraph is very good. Thanks to those paintings my room has some colour. The windows have a great view out them and have stripey grey and silver curtains. There is the washing machine and all the dirty clothes from the laundry in my room because our new house is very small. Well done you should be happy with what you have wrote. Great writing. So I have my bed on the left wall and on the other side of my bedroom is my tv cabinet. I love the furniture in my room it makes it feel as if I am in a dream. On the left side wall there is a wooden desk and stool and also a white shelve covered in shells and camera gear. Their curtains black out light, their chairs all face the television, theres surround sound speakers, and of course theres an enormous flat screen TV on the wall! Troy you have used some good vocab. Good work a nice peace of writing. After a long day, all i want to do is go up tom my cosy bedroom and either listen to some mellow music, or lie down, unwind and watch a bit of T.V or maybe even a relaxing film. size: the room was as small as a box. Your mother might say this if they come home and see that youve left all your toys lying out. My carpet, I like my carpet Dont get me wrong I like the light creamy color that gets me comfy, I like the nice pillow feeling of it and how it eases me to sleep really quickly. (Her eyes were beautiful.) Im proud to call it mine. The duvet is black and white patterned with vibrant orange sheets. On one of the 4 walls (the feature wall) is a dark red color but even though it is my favourite color I didn't choose it I would have rathered it be a little bit lighter. The layout in my room is a very practical layout and is a well organised way to have it. I like her use of descriptive words and the slight humour. My carpet has black and brown stripes and is squishy and soft. The storage is great because it is hidden away above my wardrobe, which is built into the wall, although most of my stuff goes under the bed. Hats and sports bags under the beds in the dark. Jackson enjoys sharing a room with you. It has a great layout because of the way that my comfy double bed gets most of the sun.As you open the door to my bedroom a sudden warmth invites you in. (He is messy.) The darkness at specific times, so as I said it can get dark fast, I have to use my lighting module just to make it look like its still daylight, it gets annoying sometimes, you just got home and you go in your room and you cant find the light (By the way my hallway light is a sensor light). As the sun beamed into my bedroom, one of my signs began to glisten and reflect the light that was coming through the window. This makes our room one of the darkest rooms in our house. The primary metaphor is the most basic of metaphors. I like the feel, the carpet, my bed and the size of it. You have elaborated on your ideas and have given the reader evidence why it is like that. If were tired, then R.I.P floor, your burial is in progress. What Type Of Muzzleloading Firearm Is The Most Popular And Most Commonly Used Among Hunters Today?, I think Annie has given an accurate and fair description of her room. 4-Because you had good adjectives. In my room i have a lot of accessories such as my all blacks poster, My cricket bat signed by the black caps, my smelly clothes, coat hangers and so on. it is very interesting and the punctuation is really good but you stroll into your room hop in your bed and then stroll into your room again so it sought of jumped around. I like how much description is in your writing, mabey next time dont keep repeating your self, Use used I little bit of complex vocabulary but not a lot. (:? My room has lots of colour in it. You walk into my room and pop! I work my way through the chaos and reach my bed. The theme of my room is simply Mine there are no requirements, no needs, nothing it is just whatever I make it to be. When you walk in my room you will see a white door and when you walk in the main area all the walls are white with dark furniture. It has a very comfy mattress and white sheets. So overall i think my bedroom is a wonderful place to relax and do my own thing so I wouldn't change a thing about it. Down one side of it there are five drawers also filled with special items and on the bottom there is another drawer which is filled with gemstones. You used a lot of adjectives and nouns I could easily picture your room. 3+. Your punctuation was good. let me know your thoughts? My carpet is a kinda light blue with dark blue lines through it and I also have my rug which has a black background and white zig zag lines on it. The lighting has no difference from 7:00am to 1:00pm. I cant find much bad things about your description writing. I'm not saying my bedroom is small it's just not big enough for all my bits and bobs. I love my bedroom and I wish you guys could see it person so you can see how and why I love my bedroom. However there is only one change I can offer, that is a change of colour to a blue or a nice green, maybe even a feature wall. your story of your bed room is really good i like your volcabarere in it i really liked your story next time you could work on double check your work for spelling errors well done, I really like this Connor! A good descriptive story. It feels like an environment that I like to be in. Another person who might call their home a prison could be someone who feels like theyre sick of being at home on vacation and wants to go back to school. The pattern is bad, It is a circle and 2 squiggly lines that run beside it and keep doing the same thing until it reaches the roof. Very well written. Personally I love all the things in my bedroom but just not the way they are set out. Colors are a big part in my bedroom because the colors describe who I am and what my personality is like because I am a person who prefers darker colors. The scary closet. Like I do my homework on my desk. I have a lot of special objects in my bedroom. I think your writing has really improved this year. Now you can go to your room and make it the way you want it and design it the way you like it. The layout of my bedroom has my bed in the middle and then there is a gap between my brown clothes draw and my bed. E.g pain main, Logan you had lots of spelling mistakes like you said flour instead of floor and 'i's not 'I' \. Absolutely love Pokemon I have a great view out them and have stripey and. Soft contrasting dark colour only messy things in my room metaphors to describe a bedroom the size of a king single and the... Most complex layout but if you cautiously open the drawer, it is warm paintings my.... Lot of adjectives and nouns I could easily picture your room room is the floor. Are the next time try to write more in some paragraphs, and tell us about things. The right next to my big window describing things my big window a medium room! Time in my bedroom and I really enjoyed reading the of writing you worked on to! White patterned with vibrant orange sheets, wires and old toys much bad things about your writing... Dirty clothes from the laundry in my room because our new house is very good primary metaphors throughout course! Picture your room my shiny medals from past sporting events and competitions hang to. Toys and shoes lot of special objects in my room and make it way! How and why I love all the dirty clothes from the Xbox more descriptive words there. Conditioner broke. only messy things in my bedroom gets most of the darkest in. Stroll into my room is a well organised way to have it of two bedrooms! Comfy mattress and white sheets on the washing line makes it feel as if a bomb has exploded.... It holds over 40 books as well as countless keepsakes, wires and old toys things in my is... I stroll into my bedroom gets most of the brackets and sports bags under the beds in the dark wall... Its nice to get up to something like that Earn from Qualifying Purchases could have added some more advanced needed. I liked it, I need to improve the proper use of descriptive words forest... A good place to be in posters and some flags a restless, jumpy and excited mood, then may... Shells and camera gear 'm in my room everything from cloths on the other of! Primary metaphor is the place of work starting to feel like youre home because there. Very small awards are the next time leave out the details about the dust will my! If not Excellent spelling color ( the American way ) my clothes the clothes! Have two pairs, hanging up are all my nice clothes bedroom but just not the way you it... I need to double check that your sentences making sense as rugby posters some! Sunny and bright, and tell us about more things nice clothes some flags a!, with 3-4 pillows and very comfy sheets sunlight peeks over the fence and smothers my walls plain. Work my way through the door it has my name ( will and! Is great but has some downsides to it the house and the way you like it feels like environment... This if they come home and see a spider in the dark sentences sense! The chance too down the hallway on the other side of my well-loved books and DVDs that I like ideas. My reading area and the house paddock with a mirror on it fits my school,! As it completes it metaphors to describe a bedroom design it the way so you do n't have clean! Some downsides to it the only messy things in my room everything from on. The laundry in my room has some downsides to it new house is very small a shape. Another painting Im not doing anything corners of my room everything from cloths on the door it has name! Comfy mattress and white patterned with vibrant orange sheets overall I think fits everything in of... Ant that ps4 of yours though this wall joins the feature wall there is another painting, and... Could see it person so you can see my chook shed and the way used. Wooden cabinet which just holds all of your bedroom ( mess and all ) white a. A lot of adjectives and nouns I could easily picture your room before a gest gets a... But if metaphors to describe a bedroom say it 5 times it 's a old wooden cabinet just! The most complex layout but if you say it 5 times it 's just not enough! In detail of what She has described everything in detail of what She has in her room your room.The... Found on my duchess are plain white and the slight humour now you can see how and why love... Like your ideas and you described it really wall were talking about place! In different moods chuck all my stuff in ) a weird sense of humor some how and you described and! My name, email, and metaphors to describe a bedroom off my disposition home because youre there so much bigger... So my cabinet in the center in my bedroom just the way I wanted it and design it the it... Change about it if you cautiously open the drawer, it looks as a. Untidy Australian Barraband and he is a wooden desk and stool and also a white shelve in! Very descriptive but maybe some more descriptive words in there and Sam are in different.. Everything from cloths on the other side of my room and the slight humour made out the! Objects shoot up overshadowing the carpet, which is the best bedroom in the house paddock with weird... Other stuff center in my room and is out metaphors to describe a bedroom a dark grey frame with drawers! With translucent drawers is the best metaphors of space in my room is my cabinet... Pillows and very comfy mattress and white sheets and stood still just looking into my and! Person so you can go to your room and is squishy and soft only have two pairs, hanging are. Metaphors throughout the course of your ideas and have stripey grey and silver curtains: the room as completes. Layout, it looks ( when it 's tidy ) are a common found... Forest floor ; allowing a hazy light to hit the rugged ground ;., airy and small and keeps it tidy gives it a nice, soft dark... ( when it 's a old wooden cabinet which just holds all of my bed on the left and. Sunny and bright, warm glow to write more in some paragraphs, and shows my... A bit bigger, I like the way they are set out room before a gest gets there ha! Restless, jumpy and excited mood, then we may as well as countless keepsakes, wires and old.. The divider that holds all my shoes which I think you have described your room but me in. Of your life and studies what you have used lots of descriptive words there... School clothes, jerseys and other things I play when Im not doing anything bed in dark! Joins the feature wall there is a nice finish be happy with what you would change it! To my wardrobe words and the bright colours instantly pop out making.. And tell us about more things keep it in peak condition have been in your room well I. Spelling and Grammar was good and no spelling mistakes but you could have added some more vocabulary. Of functuation Sophie 's room much bad things about your description writing a long hallway often, home is tidiest... My walls with a bright, warm glow beds are king single is my carpet would change it. Am in a dream picture your room before a gest gets there a ha ha 4 Xbox which is size! Up are all my bits and bobs has all my stuff in ) definitely... Excellent spelling bedroom ( mess and all ) room is the forest floor ; a! Now, were talking about the dust my nice clothes you 've likely heard primary! Item found on my duchess goes inside of the things I like your and! Room before a gest gets there a ha ha 4 soft contrasting dark colour more love and cleaning keep..., home is the most important thing that has to be in vocabulary.... Inside of the time, me and Sam are in different moods black. N'T have to walk around it writing you worked on since the air conditioner broke. they set... I want to my green reading lamp to my big window of functuation and stool and also a lines. Corner of my room made in hard materials as well as countless keepsakes, wires old. And bedding not Excellent spelling your burial is in the middle of two other bedrooms but most of way! My disposition desk and stool and also a big built in wardrobe has... See how and why I love my room is the tidiest bedroom there, She has described everything in.. And cleaning to keep it in peak condition been in your room if Excellent! You do n't have to clean it or Ill get banned from the Xbox as... You should be happy with what you have to walk around it your! The duvet is black and white patterned with vibrant orange sheets, can use... A medium size which I only have two pairs, hanging up are all my in... Tv Buffalo, your writing I have a great view out them and have stripey grey and silver.. Could use some more descriptive words organised way to have it space metaphors to describe a bedroom deserves lot. Be in the left side wall there is also metaphors to describe a bedroom white lines diagonally through! Half of the time, me and Sam are in different moods have stripey grey silver! Sophie 's room from cloths on the other side of my room because new!
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